Pericard’s and rearguards

By: Martyn | August 4th, 2009

On Saturday August 1st, Cardiff City were defeated two-nothing at home to Valencia B. The game, a pre-season friendly, was played in a hearty, fiery, competitive manner with a good tempo throughout. Thus, it was in many ways the perfect encounter to shepherd in the new season.

I wasn’t able to make the game due to my being in work, but I caught a hefty chunk of it thanks to the joys of the internet and in particular, Justin.tv. The hosts played some nice stuff on occasion, but too often we’d fail to shut Valencia down quickly enough and then end up with two banks of four right in front of David Marshall (Whittingham and Burke gave disciplined showings defensively to form these banks: they were eager to muscle in and retreat back, and this was compounded with the usual flair upfield. Both also linked marvellously with Joe Ledley in the centre, but relationships with the full-backs must be formulated). As a result of this, the two strikers would be marooned up top for long stretches and were forced to scurry back in order to get into the game.

Although it may seem daft, being posed a few questions right before the season starts may actually be a blessing, as receiving too many *answers* (if, for example, Valencia had been poor) can make it difficult to locate the antidote to a mid-season blip, or bolster player’s egos too soon.

Los Che played the second-string, but boy, were they a capable crew. The XI had great shape which offered width and central protection, and their carrying of ball through the territories was extraordinarily pretty, speedy and involved scores of Valencia players. By way of comparison, our launches towards their goal were more typically British, by way of either someone galloping with it like a racehorse, or a long pass straight to the strikers. In particular, wannabe porn star Éver Banega looked worthy of the 18 million fee presented to Boca Juniors for his services. Not only is he a perfect midfield wave-breaker (a player so characteristic of the 4-2-3-1 systems utilized on the continent these days), but all of their play came through him. Unfortunately, Argentina are a bit swamped in that area of the park at the moment with Mascherano, Gago, Veron and Cambiasso still flourishing, but Banega’s reading of the game and energy is truly something to behold and The Cardiff City Stadium was lucky to be graced with such an exciting and bold talent who the world will hear more of. If he can keep his penis in his pants, that is.

City lined up with Marshall in goal (could he have commanded his box a little better for the opener?), Quinn at right-back (looks a tad useless. His side was the one constantly raided, his closing down was suspect and he offered little support in attack), Hudson and Gerrard in central defence (the former looks full of mistakes, the latter is clearly still in need of experience and playing time at a higher level), and Kennedy at left-back (Ugh). The shape still needs working on, but that was to be expected from a defence that includes 3 newbies and a debutant ‘keeper. I expect this to be the back five that faces Scunthorpe, Mark “‘Ave it” Kennedy only getting the shirt due to concerns over McNaughton’s fitness.

Burke and Whittingham occupied the wide midfield berths, McPhail sat at the base of a midfield diamond (still persists in giving the ball away all the time), while Joe Ledley gleamed at the top of it. And I mean gleamed. Sure, he still takes far too many tumbles, and with the bronzed young Welshman you know the next spell of anonymity is right around the corner, but Ledley was truly majestic. It was the perfect epitome of a box-to-box midfield role, full of energy, tackling, and well-timed darts into the box. His passing can be exquisite too. Those of you who’ve witnessed Joe play may well have noted the exaggerated body movement he does before distributing the ball. When it doesn’t come off, it looks more awkward than me and my teenage mates felt when we went to see the second Matrix film in the cinema and were greeted halfway through by that medieval-discothèque-sex scene thing. Ewwwwwwwww. However, when it does, it’s clear that motion serves its purpose and isn’t merely for any hovering Sky Sports News cameras.

As pleasing as Ledley and the wide players performances were, its clear that Valencia were able to find the necessary gaps to pass their way through. The context of the occasion and opposition must of course be taken into account, but globalization dictates that many Premier League teams will come to rely on this system. If that’s the level we aspire to play at, then the tactical discipline of Dave Jones and the players must be sharpened. For now though, the blanketing 5-man Championship midfields we come up against will hopefully see their three central options having to retreat in order to pick up the roaming Chopra and Ledley, thus freeing up some space for McPhail to do his business. No… I didn’t keep a straight face upon typing that latter snippet! The midfield 4 who started on Saturday will have been told to take their shirts home and wash them, because they’ll be needing them from the off against Scunthorpe.

Sadly, Jay Bothroyd limped off early on. Here’s hoping this was just precautionary and he makes the season curtain-raiser. The partnership will be between he and Chopra, a player who looks in trim shape and gave a fantastic account of himself against the Spaniards with his intelligent running and speedy direct style.

Perhaps the most surprising aspect of the affair (bar the fact that Dave Jones had ditched his mandatory smart suit attire for a tracksuit! I’d always imagined Dave to be the type of fella who feels a bit awkward dressing down such is his attachment to black cloth, pressed trousers and ties, but perhaps the wife has ‘ad a word) was the introduction of the trialist Vincent Pericard. Pericard’s goal record is absolutely abysmal. As is an unsavoury disregard for road safety, and – according to fans of Stoke City – his penchant for going to ground far too easily (coupled with a lack of pace and ability to cushion the object the jailbait gets paid to make obey his every whim). He may well be free and would come with ‘Juvenus product’ pedigree and all that jazz, but Dave Dave Dave, I implore you: look elsewhere. If only because he describes a Bluebirds transfer as ~~guaranted pay for at least a season~~/~~satisfying to know that mugs will still take a chance on him~~/”a dream move”: any fool who grew up in Cameroon and dreamed of playing for a lower tier side like ourselves should be avoided due to a paucity of ambition.

The French-Cameroonian’s sole contribution was aiding Ross McCormack’s quest to complete the transition from hero to complete and utter numpty. Pericard won the penalty, McCormack made it 3 misses in a row. Whether the sultry Scot stays or goes, it’ll be Chopra taking ‘em from now on.

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So then; hasn’t the off-season just flown by?! Come on boys, DON’T pick up where you left off. Imagination can be such a blessing. I, for example, brighten up my morning shave by closing my eyes and waving my switched-on electric Mach 70-something-or-whatever like a magic wand. It makes it feel and sound like a light sabre. Now maybe if the players use their imaginations as wildly as the example I choose to cite, they can blot out the spectacular collapse that marred the end of last season and pretend that it was they and not Pep Guardiola’s Supermen who won the Champions League. Maybe. Plus, re-penetrating more realistic grounds, a bit of imagination will unlock some of the bolt-tight Championship rearguards! Let’s make the Irons feel like, erm, nickle, or some other weedy metal. 3 points guys… or else.